Sometimes sharing about yourself can feel like diving off a cliff. In fact, I have much trepidation about it, but I have decided that I am ready for a change. I’m tired of being called a survivor. Yes, survivor is better than victim, but it’s not enough. To say you are a survivor and to settle with that is like giving up. Please don’t give up… don’t ever give up. We were put here to live, laugh, and love unabashedly. Why give your life over to something or someone else? Shift your perspective. Take a chance. Keep moving forward. Thrive.
We are all survivors of something. I happen to be a survivor of domestic violence and my story is intense. It might take me a while to get it all out, but I will. My desire is to help other women who might be struggling on their journey. Life really is a journey so don’t get too caught up with the destination. It’s been 6 years since I escaped from my ex and it’s been one weird trip. Anyone who lives through a traumatic event is open to Post traumatic Stress Disorder. For anyone who doesn’t know what PTSD is I want to ask you to look into it. It is a very real thing and it is incredibly hard to shake. Living as a dumpster for someone’s trash year after year can have a numbing affect in the end. In order to survive you develop coping skills; so as not to completely fall of the edge. You learn to disassociate and tune out. You develop triggers that are like minefields; they go off randomly. A doorbell begins to sound like an explosion; social anxiety sets in. I lived in a combat zone and it was a daily fight to survive.
It hasn’t been easy. I’ve had to give up almost everything I had, and everyone I knew. I had to fight my abuser in court and in the street. In the end, I declare victory. You see I am that girl. I am the face of your neighbor, friend, or maybe even your sister. I am the girl who suffered in silence because she was so afraid she couldn’t even think for herself. I was in a marriage for 11 years with a man who systematically broke me down. He told me I was nothing and that no one would ever love me. He terrorized me daily.
I want to ask you to never give up hope. If you are in a dark place please keep a glimmer of hope alive. Life awaits you. I am shaking off the dust and I am getting ready to ROAR. I am FREE! I am FREE! I am FREE now.